Well, I certainly never thought I’d enjoy a buffet of dicks for dinner, but hey… it’s China.
Since coming here, Marco S has been talking about this unique (to say the least) restaurant in Beijing which is supposedly the only restaurant in the world which specializes in different types of… male genitalia for your culinary pleasure. Many days have been marked to embark on this adventure, but it has always been rescheduled due to this and that. But this Friday, it happened.
Close to Dongsishitiao station we found the place which was surprisingly big and fancy- looking. For Chinese people, it must be super luxe as everything was very heavily decorated in ‘gold’ and other shiny materials. They love that here.
There were ~15 of us going, but not all had the balls to eat balls (gigglez) and some were downright vegetarians. Reflecting the ambiance, prices were pretty steep: one tray of penises (peni?) for 4 persons was ~1000 yuan which corresponds to at least a couple of days’ salary here in China. First came some nice, conventional dishes. Salad with peanuts- appreciated. Cucumber- garlic thingamabob- endorsed! Then… bull’s penis. The restaurant seemed to be very well aware of its image to westerners, as a huge red, turgid gelatin penis rolled in to adorn the center of the table, and in the bathroom, there were pictures of huge dikz carved out in wood.
Being a man of an open mind, I thought ‘well, Christmas ham is a pig’s butt, right, so what’s all the fuss about?’ But I have to say, bull’s ding-dong is quite unlike anything else I’ve ever eaten. It did not taste much apart from the seasoning, but it was mega- chewy. Take squid to the power of 5. Bull’s penis and sheep’s penis were far from pleasurable experiences. However, the donkey’s penis wasn’t half bad! Nothing came close to the fried testicles, though, which were actually delicious! And in chilly times like these, some extra testosterone could come in handy.
The coolest part of this whole experience- living like this- must be doing things one would normally never do. Hell, even if I wanted to eat dick back home, what kind of place would serve it? And it is an honor and a hoot and a half sharing the experience with such open-minded people, fearlessly taking in this new culture to the max.